Hawkstone Spa: the world’s first wellness lager

Jan 2024
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Brace yourselves for a revelation of zen and inner peace with our newest brew: Hawkstone Spa Lager! Dry January is boring, but if you’re going to do it, you’d better do it with the world’s first wellness lager. Low-alcohol booze has never, ever tasted this good.

Let’s face it: January is a tough month to get through. Everyone’s on a post-Christmas comedown, it feels like it’s 10,000 days long, and it’s truly the most Monday of all the months in the calendar. Rick decided to change all of that with a new brew that kept all the delicious flavour of our premium lager with none of the booziness. And that’s how Hawkstone Spa was born.

It's an elixir of tranquility in the tumult of modern life – a lovely little cure for doom-scrolling and arguing with idiots on the internet. Rick brewed it with loads of fermented fruit, so it’s practically a health tonic. It’s a lot cheaper than going to the spa and covering yourself in mud or Himalayan sea salt while someone hits you with sticks. One sip and you’ll feel all your cares melt away.

"Fuck me, that's relaxing."

If you’re committing to Dry January and ditching the booze, it’s the perfect accompaniment to your detox. And if you’re not, it’s just a delicious drink that makes terrible people and modern life much more tolerable. This is tranquility in a can.

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